Big Fish, Small Fish

Ever use the phrase, "Big fish small pond; small fish big ocean"?  If you have think about how you used it.  Were you talking or thinking about yourself and you place in society?  Or someone else?  Maybe no one.  A large number of people use the phrase to describe perceived positions in communities.  I say perceived for really, we have no position...we are actually all equal....Truly, the only reason we think others are above or below us is due to our allowing this type of caste system to exist.  I know, I'm crazy.  No one is equal.  Yes, we are, the one equalizer is death.  Another, we all have the same skeleton structure.  Oh yeah, we are all born human!  We all are little itty bitty babies who need help from parents, family members, and the community to survive.  See, equal.  However, there is another way of looking at the phrases too.

Big fish small pond.  How about small fish small pond?  Think about being a big fish in a small pond.  You know ponds aren't all that big.  What happens when the big fish runs out of food?  Uh oh.  A major problem.  So lets go back to the analogy of the pond being a community.  I'm from a small farming community.  I loved it.  I learned and fostered my values, morals, thoughts, and attitudes from it.  Then something happened.  I felt like a small fish in this small pond, but I wanted to leave, to explore, to grow and expand.  The big ocean beckoned.  I swam to it wholeheartedly.  I love the ocean.  It calms me and has opened my mind and eyes to see new ideas and fascinating sights.  Yes, the big ocean is my love.  I will always care for the small pond for it prepared me for the journey to the sea, where the world is open to all sorts of possibilities and wonders.

Now the small pond, a lot of people love it.  I'm glad they do.  It is the backbone of this country and for all countries.  The small ponds are filled with all sorts of people who value traditions, enjoy the outdoors lifestyle, or the peacefulness of the country.  This too is wonderful.  The forests, animals, hills, mountains, and pathways fill one's mind with the contentedness of beauty and openness.  The ability to lose one's self in the glory of nature is the same as finding one's self in the big ocean.  The salmon go to the ocean to grow and mature, then return to the small ponds and streams to mate and in the end, die. the great equalizer.

Yes, Big fish, small fish, small pond, big pond  it's all about where our hearts are.  No matter where we are all equal. Me, I'm a fish in the ocean, loving every moment of it.  How about you?  Small pond or big ocean?  Enjoy which ever one you are in or flow in to the one you want.  Just enjoy life, and stop worrying about the big fish or small fish for we are all the same.

Randy Pausch, Thank you

Randy Pausch.  You've heard of him.  Maybe you saw him, maybe you read his book, "The Last Lecture, maybe you watched The Last Lecture.  Then again, maybe you have no idea who he was.  Dr. Pausch was a man.  Just a man, who had been able to do things that he wanted just by not letting life's journey stop him.  As a matter of fact one of his most memorable quotes is this one,
 “The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” 
― Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture

He's right you know.  The brick walls are there to show how badly we want something.  How many times have you or I slammed into a wall in our life's pathway and stopped dead, pondering on how to get through it. Struggling, trying to clamber over it, until finally we give up.  "Maybe", we think, "we need to go back to what we were doing".  "Maybe, there's a different way".  "Maybe, we should stop going after a dream and live in the real world".  

Maybe.  This time the brick wall is standing strong.  It looks extremely tall and thick.  Maybe.....No!  I want this badly!  This time!  I want to succeed at it!  This time!  The wall will be overcome!  Now!  This time I will not be discouraged by those who tell me I can't.  This time I will keep to the dream and reach the goal!  This time!  

Thank you Dr. Pausch for your last lecture.  I wish I could have known you.  Actually, I did know you. You taught us all how to live and not be afraid of failure or success.  You died, and by doing so, you brought us to our own individual lives.  This time the brick wall will be breached!

The New Cat

My mom loves to tell stories.  I guess I got my love from her and I handed it down to my daughter.  She tells wonderful stories.  They both do.  It's a treasure we don't often hear about or share much anymore.  The fun of storytelling.  It really is fun and it shares the living history of a family.  Who they are, where they came from, why they believe, and most importantly, what you, the individual, is all about.  Yeah, you!  Just look at your parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents.  You won't be identical, but there will be an element, a certain idiosyncrasy which identifies you as belonging to this family lineage, this tribe, this kindred.
So, what does all this have to do with stories.  Well, stories are the foundations of our family and can teach us so much about our family's journey through life.  Take for instance:  "The New Cat":

One frosty autumn night my mother was busily baking and cooking dinner,  We lived on the farm in Central New York then, and the night was filled with the promise of a freeze or maybe if we were lucky, SNOW!  Dusk had come and gone, and the darkness filled the void of the sky as the stars and moon were hooded by the coming snowstorm.  The only light came from the farmhouse and the barn, welcoming beacons of warmth and comfort.  Between the two havens, darkness swelled concealing what lay between.

Mom bustled about the well lit kitchen filling the house with the aroma of baking and the sizzle of meat cooking.  She filled a plate of scraps and a bowl with fresh milk, grabbing her sweater, she opened the kitchen door stepped outside and placed the plate and bowl on the small concrete porch.  "Here kitty, kitty! Here kitty, kitty"!  She called.  Out of the darkness came the five farm cats.  Mewing and purring they jumped onto the porch, sauntering to their food.  Mom stroked each cat and was rewarded with a purr and a rubbing of head under her hand.  Just out of range of the kitchen light, she caught the image of another cat and called to it. "Here kitty, kitty!  Come here silly or your food will be gone".  It was small and seemed hesitant, but then came forward rather timidly. Then upon reaching the plate, it found a place and began to eat, warily at first then wholeheartedly.  Mom smiled at this new cat, pats it gently, and giving it the same love and attention she gave to the others.

Going back inside, Mom washes her hands and returns to the tasks at hand.  My father and brother would be up from the barn soon, along with me trotting after them asking all sorts of questions.  My sister was setting the table and helping mom with the evening meal. " When did we get the new black cat"? Mom asks Dawn.
 "What black cat"? Dawn replies.
" The one I was just petting outside", Mom answers.
Dawn shakes her head, "I don't know.  I didn't know we had a black cat".
Mom goes to the kitchen door and glances out.  "It's right there".
Walking over to door, Dawn looks out.  She looks again. Soon, Mom notices that Dawn hasn't moved from window and seems to be shaking.
"What's wrong?  Why are you shaking"?  Mom asks.
Dawn turns around and is shaking with laughter.  She just points out the window.  "Is....is....that....the....black.........cat.....you petted? She finally gets out.
Mom glances out again, "Yes"!
Dawn laughs even harder.  "Mom, that isn't a cat!"
"What are you talking about"?  Mom asks.
"Look"!  Dawn exclaims.

Mom finally looks out the window and stares at the little cat she had been petting and loving.....Yeah, you go it.....  "It's a SKUNK"!  Mom blurts out.  There it was in all it's little glory.  The little black animal with a white stripe down it's back, enjoying a plate of food with the farms cats and relishing a drink of milk.  Mom watched it as it finished it's meal and trotted off back into the darkness.  "Well, I don't know", Mom says.
At that, Dawn cracks up with laughter again and Mom, she joined in laughing about how she welcomed the little skunk into the family and how well it fit in.

Now, the skunk never did come back, or if it did, it would come later in the night. But, the story of how Mom fed and loved a skunk is one I cherish and love to know how Mom, didn't care about who came to dinner.  She would accept anyone, and maybe that's why I am the way I am.  You see, when you begin to look at the story you realize all sorts of things.  First, Mom didn't pay attention to what the animal was, she knew it was hungry and fed it.  Second, notice something really interesting?  The cats didn't react against the skunk.  That's right, they welcomed it into their midst and shared what they had.  Yeah, the farm cats didn't care that it was a skunk and different.  Nope. they could have cared less.  Now, that is something to think about.  We humans, consider ourselves to be so high and mighty; yet, if someone is different from us, we want to get rid of them.  We condemn them, say "they are going to hell", or deny them rights.  I think I would rather be like the farm cats and welcome the different one in.  I know I do my best to be like mom and accept others.  By the way, this is a true story.  Mom really did feed a skunk and pet it one dark night....it's all a part of my family history.  A story to share to my child and her children to come....and to give to you.

It's Quiet in the House

It's quiet in the house.  Hardly a sound is being made.  Outside, the rain falls, turning the streets into minor rivers down which the water flows into the overflowing drainage ditches.  The thunder booms and the lightning flashes across the sky.  A world of chaos out there.  Inside, is a huge difference.  Soft light fills the room casting shadows. The only sounds are the fans which cool the air.  The cats are all sound asleep, as are the dogs.  Sleeping through the wildness of the atmosphere.  Dreaming their dreams of running, playing, or jumping.
CRASH! All jump at the sound so close by.  Then as it passes, back into the slumber they go.  The humans going about their business quietly as if in silent rebellion against the rantings of nature.  One is reading, delving into a world of adventure and intrigue.  Another watches the rain and seems to be on the verge of joining the pets in sleep.  Me, I'm watching it all and thinking of the joys of a rain storm.  The times of just being together and watching the rain.
The blueberry pie was able to finish baking and it's scent fills the rooms of the tranquil house, while the tempest rages outside.  It's cozy and comfy inside.  "Come in", the house whispers, "and enjoy the peacefulness of a home.  A home filled with love and contentment".  Yes, that is what is found right now at this moment.  A time to enjoy and feel blessed.  A moment to be cherished and enjoyed.
It's quiet in the house.  Tranquil and peaceful against the rages and tumults of the outside.  A time for stories and laughter.  A time to be together.  Listen to the rain and savor this moment, before it winks away....

One of Those Days

Ever had one of those days?  You know, one of THOSE days where you feel like you shouldn't have gotten out of bed.  Yeah, a day like today.  It's been one of those days.  First, you wake up great, do some exercises and stretch out the kinks in the body.  Feeling great, you take the dogs out, watch the sunrise, enjoy a cup of coffee, and have a delicious breakfast.  Then, something happens...just something minor, an irritant really, but it bugs you.  Puts you edge a little.  Okay, you say to yourself, just a little snafu.  No biggie.  Just as you are convincing yourself of that, another nuisance occurs.  Maybe it's someone cutting you off, or you get pushed out of the way, not big, but a bother all the same.

Alright, you say, just a couple of things to keep you hopping this day.  The rest of the day will be good.  Yeah, right.  There's the woman who always complains heading your way.... great.  You can either hide or deal with her.  No time to run off, " Hi there!"  15 minutes later, if your lucky, you get away and are shaking your head wondering why you were the one who had to hear about everything going wrong in her life. Weren't you the fortuitous one?

The day drags on with one thing after another happening.  "I shouldn't have gotten out of bed", you groan.  At home, more disturbances occur and you begin to feel as though you are being plagued by misfortune.  You rail against everyone and thing you come across.  Your frustrations venting from you like a torrent of water caught in the grips of Niagara Falls.  Your angry, disgusted, and vexed.  Today has been a thorn in your side.  "What did I do to deserve this?"  You shout to the sky.

Hey, stop a minute!  It's just one of those days.  We all have them.  It's just a part of life.  Part of the journey we are all on.  Think about the morning.  It was great!  The things that happened, well, have you ever cut someone else off?  Have you ever pushed someone out of the way?  Have you ever done the same things which happened to you today, to someone else?  Ummm, feeling a little guilty here. And what about the woman who complains.  She needed someone to talk to, to get some of her frustrations out. She told you. Hey, that's an honor for she trusts you.  Finds you to be sympathetic and non-judgmental. She needed someone and you were there.  Feeling a little better?  You do and you realize what an idiot you were getting upset over nothing.  Time to apologize to everyone you screamed at when you were venting.  What do they say, "No problem, you had one of those days".

Yeah, one of THOSE days.  Hey, we all have them, and if we are blessed, we have people in our journey who recognizes these type of days and help us through them...It may take some yelling or crying to get it out of our system (better yet, go running, exercising, or even cleaning), but we get through them.  It's a part of life, a part of our journey, a part of being human.  Next time, think about the humor in the thing which sets you off.  You might find yourself having an awesome day instead, just by laughing it away!

Sunday....

Ahh, it's Sunday!  A day of relaxation, fun, family, and friends.  For some a day of hope, for others a day to play and enjoy the world of sports.  For me, today was at first a day awaking to memories of Sunday dinners of the past.  Thinking of Gram's chicken, Aunt Lois' homemade rolls, and Mom's pie.  Mmmmm. What a nice way to wake up!  Upon rising, I walked into the kitchen, pulled out a pan and began making sausage gravy.  My husband came in grinning, pulled out his favorite mixing bowl; filling it with the ingredients for his delicious biscuits.  Yes, sausage gravy and biscuits for breakfast on this beautiful Sunday.  Mandi appears and sets the table, the house is filled with music from Mannheim Steamrollers, Sunday Morning Coffee II; the aroma of baking biscuits and sausage grave.  Mmmmm.  A great day.

Breakfast ended, playing with the dogs outside, coming in and grabbing a vitamin water. Cooling off, flipping on the tv, finding the show, Treehouse Masters and dreaming of a treehouse.  I always wanted a treehouse, so does, Rick.  A fascinating show with so many awesome ideas.... Mandi is busy writing her fan fiction.  She has quite a few followers and is a really good writer.  So creative.... Made homemade dog treats for Reggie and Bella, which they love!  They follow me every time I go to the kitchen.

Sunday, quiet, relaxing, and full of love. A day for fun, family, and friends. We all have different ways to enjoy it.  We all have different memories of it.  Today was a day of memories. A day of enjoyment and peace.  Almost time to fix dinner.....hmmmm, I'm thinking chicken....thanks for the memories and love.  Sunday,

The Deadly Cost of Indifference

“The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it’s indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it’s indifference.” 
― Elie Wiesel”

I found this quote the other day and thought about how true it is.  Many of us consider the opposites to be the most horrifying; but Elie Wiesel brings forth the truth.  It is indifference which is the worse of all for with indifference comes the ability to stop caring about anyone else and even ourselves.  We become cold, closed off, and heartless towards others around us.  We look the other way at the homeless or poor; they become the invisible; ghost like wraiths who hover in the corners of our eyes.  Always there, but rarely seen.  

Another author discussed this same thought in one of the most widely known books of all times.  "There are some upon this earth of yours,' returned the Spirit, 'who lay claim to know us, and who do their deeds of passion, pride, ill-will, hatred, envy, bigotry, and selfishness in our name; who are as strange to us and all our kith and kin, as if they had never lived. Remember that, and charge their doings on themselves, not us.” I wear the chain I forged in life....I made it link by link, and yard by yard; I girded it on of my own free will, and of my own free will I wore it.”
― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol― Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol

A definite look at what indifference creates, but we keep the blinders on, never looking at those around us, or if we do see them we look down upon them and claim they are lazy, worthless, and deserve their position in the hierarchy of humanity.  

Yes, a horrifying thought, but a true one.  So what compelled me to go off like this?  Simple, a news article I read this morning.  You see a woman's body was discovered in a  house in a Largo, Florida neighborhood.  It was so badly decomposed that police didn't even know it was a woman's body.  How did they find it?  The neighborhood association placed a lien on her property and hired a lawn maintenance to mow her lawn.  He discovered the sliding glass doors open a crack and upon investigating found the body.  The neighbors hadn't seen her in two years and thought she had moved.  Can you even imagine it?  You hadn't seen this person in two years and you never thought about checking on her.  Did you see a moving van?  Did you do anything?  Or did you just wonder and shrug your shoulders; moving on and going about your own business?  

Yeah, indifference, it is horrifying.  What has become of us, as a society to not care?  I don't know about you, but I admit, I have said "I don't care" many times...the truth is I need to care, I should care, and I will care.  No one should ever have to die like this.  No one should be the victim of indifference.  No one should be invisible.  Open the heart, eyes, and mind and make a difference by being the difference.  

Change in the Air

Hey!  Can you feel it?  Do you see it? Can you touch it?  Do you smell it?  It's there! Yes, it's there.  Slowly and subtly it's here.  It's all around us; whether, in the rolling hills of the Northeast United States or the swampy tropical humidity of the Southeast.  The Northwest and Southwest is a part of it too!  So is Europe, Russia, and parts of Asia!  Change is in the air!  The movement from summer to autumn is upon us!  It's subtle approach has been gentle.  Not drastic or rash, but quiet and peaceful.  The sun seems to move in a lower angle during the day.  The breeze has a slight chill to it.  Humidity is bit lower, but still hanging on.  Watch the animals...the hair on a dog is thickening and it's summer coat is falling out.  Squirrels and birds are on the move, hunting for food to store for the long months of winter.  Even the water mammals are moving to shore up for the season to come.  Leaves are turning to yellow and harvest is beginning in various states.
                                             

Yep, change is in the air; but, it's more than just a seasonal transformation though.  It's a metamorphosis of the human race.  Yes, we the people of Earth are moving through a transition.  We are becoming more of a global environment rather than a national or regional one.  We are aware of the diversity which enhances all of humankind if we allow it too.  This is the change which is moving throughout the entire Earth.  Humanity is growing and expanding from the ideals which have been utilized since the eras of reason and renaissance.  This is a time of learning and educating.  A time of communicating and understanding.  A time for human rights, to realize how our differences are our strengths and how discriminating against people due to sexual orientation, gender, race, religion, and social class are just a means of trying to stop this change from occurring.  However, those who utilize these measures will find themselves scrabbling to catch up with humanity or be left behind and lost in the misty haze of the past.

Change is definitely in the air.  It can be felt, seen, touched, and smelt.  We hear it and move toward it with our eye wide open and our hearts filled with hope.  Our minds are evolving and our dreams expanding.  We are one Earth, united against the bigotry and hatred of the past.  We are global, we are also national, and regional.  We are humanity and change IS in the air.  It's yours and my decision whether to go with it or remain behind.  Stagnant or flowing.  Life enhancing or discriminating.  It's time to decide.  For me, change.  What about you?

A Dream Of Something Natural...

A long time ago I had dream.  It was an amazing dream, and no it didn't come to past.  But it filled my mind and heart for several years.  You see in this dream, I bought back my family's farm.  The house, the land, all of it. Bringing it back to my family, but not as a farm.  No, this is where the dream became a fantasy.  I turned the old farm into a natural resort.  No, not nudist,  a natural resort.  The farm house would become a bed and breakfast.  I created plans to rebuild the old horse barn which would be a 1940s style nightclub with live music.  The field above the farmhouse would become a primitive campground with a few primitive cabins along with it.  The rest of the land?  Well, the field closest to the river would be filled with a garden to supply fresh vegetables.  A greenhouse would be built to provide vegetables in the winter time as well.  An orchard of apples would have risen in the field by the near the house, along with grapes to create juice and wine.  Maple trees would line the road and a new sapling would be placed where one had stood directly in the front of the house.  Lilac bushes were to be found by the house as well.

In the summer, strawberries would be picked and raspberry and blackberry brambles found.  People coming to this home of mine would fine peace and quiet.  Hiking, fishing, swimming during the day, and at night a baseball field would pull in more as well as the nightclub.  Historical accounts about Pitcher Springs and the surrounding communities....the joy of someone seeing a lightening bug for the first time....In the winter, sledding, ice skating, Christmas joy, and cross country skiing....the aroma of maple sap being boiled....

A dream, a fantasy, something to create if only in one's mind....is a wonderful moment to enjoy...Keep dreaming, for though this one will not come true, it has been fun coming up with all the ideas, thoughts, and plans...and many dreams do come true....

Twerkin' and News

With all the different things happening in the news lately, there is one topic which I have been trying to figure out and still haven't been able to understand the logic or intelligence of.  What the heck is wrong with Miley Cyrus?  Have you seen that girl's video?  Every time I see a video of her, she is twerkin' her butt!  I'm sorry, but, I don't want to watch someone's butt....I like to see the faces of people!  Or maybe she thinks it is her face?  Okay, I know, when you're a "star" I guess, you think you're all wonderful; but, I'm sorry, you're not.  Shaking your butt all over the place is really not attractive...although, some people may think so. Really, what is going on?  Have you got itching powder in your pants?  There's a parody of her video which states quite thoroughly that you itch there. Or do you have ants in your pants?  A mouse?  Plus, what is with the name of what you are doing?  Twerkin' ?  Who comes up with these names?  I mean really twerkin'?  How do you get that out of shaking an ass and bouncing it around?  And the insane thing about this all-- people are talking about it, watching her video and the parody, and her song is at the top of the charts!  I'm sorry, give me Lady Gaga anyday!  I love her stuff.  But watching Miley Cyrus, trying to be cool and I guess sophisticated ( I'm pushing I know, more like a girl trying to be a stripper and pole dancing with no rhythm), well that's like trying to understand why Shirley Jones had to tell us about her sex life with Jack Cassidy.  Do we really want to know it or see it?  Nope!  Just realize that you do not have the greatest moves and stop gyrating that thing, it's out of control!  Okay!  I've had some fun and I hope you have too....I think I'm going to do some twerkin' !  Bet you will too!